MY Sunday Sermon

I believe That God does not make mistakes. I believe He knows what He's doing ALL THE TIME.
I do not believe in religion. I believe in relationship.
And I have expressed those feelings. Its just that simple.

I feel sorry for people who worship a God they think is flawed and does things wrong sometimes.
Most of all, I feel sorry for people who think they are God's own personal appointed judges on this earth to carry out His condemnation.
Who in the HELL do you think you ARE???

When I decide to "follow" some one's blog, I bother to take the time to actually READ their page. All of it. And I read responses from other people as well. I do this to get a feel for what kind of person they are and what kind of people their "followers" are.

And when I see that someone new has decided to "follow" me, I go to their blog. And I READ it. I do this because I'd like to know what kind of person is reading me and has such an interest in me.

Two people, I have blocked, and one I'm not following anymore. These people have 3000+ readers. I can't imagine where they all come from. But its a little scary to know there are that many people out there who want people like me dead. Or convert to "their" religion and get "saved".
You kinda sound like those people who blew up the towers on 9/11.

Why don't you go over there and "save" them? They want to kill you for not believing as they do as much as you want to kill them. Maybe you could all blow yourselves up.

Some of the meanest, nastiest, most narrow-minded and cruel people I've met in my life proclaim themselves to be "Christians" or "Catholics"
Really? You really think God approves of your behavior??

One of you was banned from my site because you insisted on sending me personal emails telling me over and over how "God loves the sinner but hates the sin--all sin." Who do you think you are??

Another was banned because once I got to the point on their page where they talk about practicing the Berean faith I just froze.

I've been going to a Berean church in my town for a little over a year now because its the ONLY church I've found where I feel a little bit comfortable. The music is wonderful. The pastor is great. He gets his message across without it even sounding like a sermon. And there is no hell, fire, nor is there brimstone.
But reading that this blogger is of the Berean faith was enough to make me stop reading, make a few clicks, and *poof* they're gone.

And now I'm reconsidering even going to that church because if THIS is what Bereans are really like behind the safety and courage of their keyboard, I don't think I'm interested anymore.

And there is one other whom I no longer follow but I left on my list that they are following me. For one reason and one reason only: We agreed to disagree.

Now listen. Here's a warning or "disclaimer", if you prefer that word, for anyone who should choose to read this blog I call The Wilderness --

You may not agree with everything I write. And that's fine.
And I sure as hell won't agree with everything you write. And that's fine, too.
But do not, and I mean NOT start thinking you can "preach" to ME.
You've got your 3000+ sheep. Preach to THEM.
There's enough room on the Internet for every one's point of view.

My personal view of the bible stands --
It's chock-full of misinterpretations and mistakes because it was written by man. Not God, as you all claim.
If you really believe God, Himself, penned that book, then you're no better nor any more intelligent than the psychotic muslims that want to overthrow our country and kill all the infidels that won't convert.

The only one who needs to answer to God when I die about how I lived my life is ME.
The only who needs to answer to the way I treated other people is ME.

There are a lot of people out there, it seems, who would do well to heed those words.

To Pray

I want to pray. But my prayer would be forged of selfishness.
I want my life back. I want things to be easy. I want things the way they were. I want to be happy.
I want all these things given back to me without working for them.
I want them given to me. Just given to me. Without effort. Like manna.
I want to find my way out of this wilderness.
But miracles are not help. Miracles don't teach you anything. There is no wisdom.
The only way out of the wilderness is through.
Wisdom is gained by going through.
Not around.

Lost

Today I am lost in the wilderness. Lost, again.
I am fighting the winds, the cold, the blinding snow.

But I need only to seek His face.
And I'll make it through.

I fall to my knees, overcome by the elements.
He bends down and scoops me up in His arms.

I'll make it through.

On The Topic Of Religion

Religion.
There have been more wars--slaughter, death, suffering--fought over that one thing than all the wars on this earth combined.
More people have died; more people have given their lives over that word.
"Religion".

And for what?
Because one person thinks they know better than another.
Because one "religion" thinks they are right (whatever "right" means) and another is wrong.

There are passages all over the bible that man says God actually told them to kill people because they believed differently. I don't believe that.
I don't know how they did things back then, but I don't believe God actually endorsed murder.
I just don't.
And then some groups re-wrote their own book to suit themselves. What's that all about?

Killing other people because they don't believe the same as you do?
I could interpret these things as I understand them. I could re-word these things and turn them around to ease my own discomfort over what they say.
I could work night and day on understanding them, but to what end?
There are parts in that book that just bother the hell out of me...

I don't believe God's son died and rose from the dead so people could create a religion--hundreds of religions--so we could step up the effort to annihilate each other.
I just don't.

Most of these religion people, godly men, church ladies, really believe that sitting in a church once a week and acting like a jerk out in the world is what its all about. They believe going through the motions is enough to "save" them.
Rituals.
Going through the motions.
Robots.

That book was written thousands of years ago when people (evidently) really did go around killing each other over this. Some people still, to this day, take the words literally.
Look at 911. No way did God tell anyone to do that. Those people are nuts.
And this is a prime example of my point.

This is why I don't subscribe to "religion".
This is why I don't belong to a "church".
This kind of thing gets people killed and I don't think God condones that sort of thing. I just don't.

I do visit one church on occasion. I go because its beautiful. The music and lights and even the message is beautiful.
But every time, every time without fail, I cry.
I cry when I go. And why? Maybe I'm crying for all the lost souls.

Even when I go to this one church I feel least threatened in, I see all around me these carnal Christians; these people who go through the motions; these people who think somehow they are better than anyone else--and even better than the people sitting next to them--because they go to "church".

I feel sorry for them and are afraid of them at the same time. I see through them. They are Pharisees; people who are lost.
They think they are "right" and you can never convince them otherwise.
I think that's why I cry.

They go out into the world and fight their own private war.
They look down on, criticize, exclude anyone not like them.
They go out into the world and act like a complete jerk.
They are afraid, although they may not realize it, of anyone who is different.
They are lost and it breaks my heart. That's why I cry.

But nothing hurts more than the people I love most being afraid of me.
I'm pushed away. Looked at like I grew another arm. Respected less.
That's the main reason I cry, I think.

Even a member of my own family has become a robot.
He tell me he wishes he had my "faith". This blows my mind.
I tell him God's son died so we could have a relationship, not a religion.
And I still just don't think he understands that. He still feels lost. He's still wrapped up in the whole "going through the motions" thing. Going to church. He still thinks that's what its all about.

I turn my back on these things and these people. I go my own way because I am different from them.
Too many things have happened in my life. Too many things have gone wrong--and too many things have gone right.
I believe there is something bigger than me. I believe something hears me when I talk to it. And this gives me peace.
Psychosomatic? Delusional? Out of my mind? Who knows.

I have a relationship.
I don't have a religion.
I don't believe in religion.

Living In The Now

Every morning when I wake up, I say out loud that I'm glad I woke up;
that I'm grateful to be alive;
that I'm grateful for another chance.
It pumps me up for the day ahead of me.

I feed the rabbits, let the dogs out, and sit there with them for a while, even if its cold out.
And I do my best to look at them and smile; to be happy; to not be frustrated with their barking and scrapping and running around.

I remember that they are my pets, my companions, they love me, they want to make me happy.
I don't rush them to 'go potty'. I just sit there with them, watch what they do, and try to remain calm.
And it pretty much works the majority of the time.

I try to look at everything this way. I try to look at things as they are happening Now.
I remind myself to not compare Now to the past. Because the past is gone.
All I have is Now.

And Now is pretty good. Its ok.
I have what I need. Not necesarrily all I want, but definately what I need.
So that's ok, I guess.

I fall short sometimes. I slip back into the past. But then I crawl back out into the light. Into the Now.
Its difficult, but I'm learning.
I'm learning.

New Title

I've changed the title of this blog.
Its the same blog, minus the politics.

There may be a blog dedicated to that in the future.
I don't know at this time.

Hope this doesn't cause any confusion.

How Did We Get Here?

Something that's always fascinated me is the unending struggle between the people who embrace Creationism and the people who believe Darwinism.
Both groups claim proof of their respective phenomenas; both have their theories. As for myself, I've been content to sit back and watch the the show.
To see the human race so passionate, so unwavering, so determined on a subject, just makes me wonder what would happen if they were debating something worthwhile.

The various theories on this topic alone could keep a person busy running in circles for, well, an eternity...
I went to a school where Darwinism was not taught. We were told it was a big lie perpetrated by the devil to confuse us.
We were literally told that God put those dinosaur bones (for example) in the earth to confuse us. No, really. That's what they told us.

We were instructed that no way did man descend from apes. God created Adam and Eve and that was that. No primordial ooze crawling out of the sea, first crawling, then walking, then discovering fire, then running for office.
Although, given the current state of affairs, it kinda makes me wonder. But that would be a segue into politics and that's not what I want to talk about at the moment.

Another theory--and this is a good one thought up by the religious crowd--involves the story of Cain and Abel, the sons of Adam and Eve.
The story goes that Cain was very jealous of his brother, Abel, because he had made a sacrifice to God that was pleasing to Him.

It wasn't that Abel's sacrifice was any better than Cain's, it was that Abel made his sacrifice with the right attitude; an attitude of giving something to God. Cain's was made with an attitude of getting something from God. Kind of like earning brownie points.
Long story short, this pissed off Cain and he smashed his brother's head in. The first murder on planet earth.

As punishment, Cain was banned from the Garden and never heard from again.
Where the theory comes in here is this:
It is written in the Bible that Cain and all his descendants were cursed from then on. So the Christians finish the story for themselves and use Darwin's theory to do it.

It is said that Cain's family branched off from the human race and went "backward", so to speak, they were turned into apes and were forced to evolve (and this is when God made all the lesser primates to keep them company). No, I'm serious here. This is how the theory goes.
So guess who the religious folk believe are the descendants of Cain? I won't even answer that one but I can see the huge flaw in this already. I don't believe they gave themselves time to think that one out properly.

On that same note, given the, um, completion of "Cain's descendants", wouldn't it stand to reason that given the location and people of Jesus' birth, that he would more closely resemble a descendant of Cain rather than that of Abel?

What's my take on all this? Personally, I don't waste time troubling my mind about it.
There were dinosaurs. That's just fact. I don't believe in a God who would plant false evidence. That's just silly.
I mean, this is where our gas, coal, oil come from, isn't it? How could all these things have come about from a time the Bible doesn't even mention?
I could go off on another tangent about how gas, coal, oil, and even money and precious jewels are products of the devil.
Then I could add, look at all the gold and precious jems the Catholic church uses in their decor. Yep. Kinda makes ya wonder who the real bad buy is, hu?

In conclusion, how did we get here? I don't know. My brain isn't big enough to figure that one out. It's all I can do to keep my little world from falling apart day to day.
I do believe in a power bigger than ourselves, though. I won't fool myself on that one. I've seen too many things happen in my own life to think otherwise.
And I believe that someday, when I've left here, I'll have all the answers I need. I think right now The Entity just wants us to be nice to each other. It looks like we have our hands full with that.

As for the answer to the riddle that's as old as time? I'll leave that to the religions and science to figure out. I enjoy the drama.
After all, there are less than 350 days left as of this writing until The End Of The World, anyway.
I can wait.